Lately, I have found the first question that springs to mind when having guests for dinner is, red wine or white wine? Now, this either makes me a lush or a considerate host… I am going to go with the latter. Even though my personal answer to this silly wine question is always a resounding “YES! I like ALL wine”, I have found that most people definitely have a preference. And when I say most people, I am referring to women considering they are my core focus group, because let’s face it, ALL women like wine. I think we can all agree on this point.
Even though I don’t usually divulge my liquid grape salad preference (I like to keep the mystery alive) – It turns out that your wine of choice actually says a lot about you! Basically, I have been doing this all wrong… In an effort to figure out my purpose in this world and what I want to be when I grow up, I should have just been looking at what my wine glass was trying to tell me.
- You are down to earth, smart, ambitious, and genuine.
- You are mysterious, spicy, and flirtatious – but you are extremely loyal when it comes to relationships.
- You are great in bed!
- You are a romantic who prefers to stay in (and watch jeopardy) rather than go out to the club.
- You like cats & dogs, but if you had to choose it would always be dogs.
- You are strangely competitive and you often wonder why people don’t want to play games with you.
- You prefer your men to look like they just came from the mountain top – scruff, plaid, ax, and all!
- You are a free spirited lover of all things outdoors.
- You pretend you don’t like Taylor Swift, but secretly her jams are always flowing in your mind. Haters gonna hate!
- You are always the life of the party and full of laughs.
- You are witty and you don’t bullsh*t people.
- You like to have a good time and meet lots of new people…sometimes too may.
- You try to always stay active and often feel guilty when you haven’t exercised in some way, shape or form.
- You tend to wear less clothing than your red wine counterpart.
Now, if this wine stereotyping has only confused your life and you are more lost than ever before, I am going to suggest you adopt The Wine Clock Theory. This is the theory I use when making important wine decisions. The theory basically allows you to have ALL wine and drink it ALL the time!
The Wine Clock Theory
The Wine Clock Theory states that as the hands of time turn, so does the darkness of the wine you drink. Therefore, when faced with the tough decision of red or white wine, the Wine Clock Theory allows you to answer the question with THIS question… What time is it?
Another benefit to this fabulous theory is that you can substitute. That’s right! The theory is variable depending on the types of wine you enjoy, as long as you remember that as the day becomes darker so must the juices in your glass. There you have it…a simple, inclusive and guilt-free way to bring all wines to the party! #NoWineLeftBehind
**The Wine Clock Theory – another great reason to start wearing a watch!**
Personally, I prefer red wine. Yep, I said it! However, for some reason I feel less guilty about pouring a large glass of white wine at 4pm, when I have had it up to my eyeballs with #motherhood duties. So pick your poison wine lovers…or pick whatever is on hand!